Tabloid Whore!

8.23.2006

THE NATIONAL ENQUIRER SAYS: JONBENET MURDER SUSPECT DIDN'T DO IT!


I knew this week's issue of The National Enquirer would be all over the JonBenet Ramsey case! If you want the real dirt on these kind of stories, The Enquirer is the place to go. This week they have a shit load of coverage on this story and that crackpot John Mark Karr who confessed to JonBenet's murder. The Enquirer has uncovered another witness that claims cuckoo bird could not have committed this crime because she saw him at the time JonBenet was killed. I can't wait to read all about that, but I first have to get over the horrid outfit he is wearing in the photo The Enquirer has on it's cover (oh and the hair!). I will be totally bummed if it turns out that this nut job didn't kill JonBenet. More and more weird stuff keeps popping up to cause doubt, so we're just going to have to wait and see what kind of dirt the District Attorney has to nail this guy. I do love all the dirty scandal coming out of this though! Also in The National Enquirer this week, is there already trouble in paradise for Keith Urban and Nicole Kidman? Plus, something more horrifying than John Mark Karr's hair, eyeliner and horrible all white outfit: Jessica Simpson is rumored to be having a "secret romance" with my dreamy John Mayer! No! No! Please say it ain't so! Why John, whyyyyyy?!
Cover compliments of The National Enquirer

14 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

He didn't do it.

1:04 PM, August 23, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

He looks like a reject from "Wham"

1:46 PM, August 23, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yah, I don't think he did it either. I want to believe he did so poor JonBenet can be at peace, but it just doesn't make sense. He seems too confident and loving the attention. I'd be really surprised if they produced some good evidence and he did do it.

Please spare us the creepy photos...he's scary enough without the eyeliner and Flock of Seagulls do...ugh!!!!!!!!!

3:27 PM, August 23, 2006  
Blogger Laura said...

First off, he's MY John Mayer. Secondly, there is no way in hell he would hook up with Jessica Simpson. Never. No way.

3:53 PM, August 23, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why are these people feeding into this whitewash? Good Grief anyone who follows this bullcrap is a total asshole.

5:00 PM, August 23, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

anon 5:00

You're on a GOSSIP blog...take your ass hole somewhere else.

8:34 AM, August 24, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No way John Mayer dates beauties WITHOUT brains. That automatically blocks Jess out of that competition.

And Freakboy is just a famewhore - either that, or he's smart enough to get his ass out of a Thai prison. (And speaking of prison and his ass, he's going to be treated just like the 6-year old girls he says he loves so much. Superfreak.)

8:44 AM, August 24, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The other night I was channel surfing and paused on CNN as they were doing an in depth story on the life of this creep...like he's already been tried and found guilty. And of course the Enquirer would be all over this, cause they are the source that half of America goes to for hard hitting news.
And if I was John Mayer I would be suing this rag for even mentioning my name in the same publication as Jessica Simpson.

2:50 PM, August 24, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

this psycho wants a book/movie to pay for his children college education which he cannot afford...unbelievable what will they do next.

3:31 PM, August 24, 2006  
Anonymous Samantha said...

I don't believe that he did it. He said in an interview that I love Jonbenet. If he killed her wouldn't he say that I loved her.

4:12 PM, August 25, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Buffalo Bill + pedophile =
John Mark Karr

This idiot brings a new meaning to "Attention Deficit Disorder"

1:44 AM, August 26, 2006  
Anonymous Kelly said...

Wow, he was really hott.

5:05 PM, August 26, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Kelly you are high on crack if you think this piece of poop is hot. he looks like a refurbished elvis presley.

10:57 PM, August 30, 2006  
Blogger lukyk9 said...

my boat was parked(fv"Loriet")at Stone Boatworks,Alameda Ca. xmas96.. PA had the 96'sail"Caroline" up on the boat weighs. i was on my way to coffee xmas day wen the office lady said someone was looking 4help. it was billG. he was in the rigging loft with his inner circle of coherts. a big fat bearded guy was the lead talker. he translated for billG. the interview was short but sweet. "what wud i do 4money?" and"how big was my equipment?"i passed and we went to the air base. a hanger with private leer jets. one Black and one Red. we hung out for a few hours. the partnership, myself and a mechanic. he had the instructions. i was unawares of the mission details.we boarded the Red jet and flew to Denver. at the end of the runway we met a White single engine cargo plane. the two of us ran for it. the mechanic was sure we were seen by the tower. we then flew over Boulder. we harnessed up in a tandem rig . we parachuted together to touch down near the road.i was up on the retaining wall wen i was told i had a collar on. it was a ctrl. he had a variable eq that could wake me up or put me to sleep. he warned me it held an explosive charge and if i disobeyed he wud blo my hed off.oh well.i had been shanghaied. we scurried to the gate in front of the storm drain tunnel. 2 dudes in Black w8ed. the 2 locks were cut and the gate was open. we mounted trail bikes and raced to the fifteenth st man hole.i pushed up the lid and we popped up into the middle of the st. the partner made a call to verify which house. it was across the st. we were met by the house boy. and we were shown into the bak room. it was at the top of the stairs . i was told to go downstairs. i conceded to be bossed around. no problemo. no blo up . a first encounter with a very agitated little girl. someone had deposited her in basement. the house had been taken over by the pilot and MD. maybe Fleet was there. i never knew and still don't know.but after some cohersion we got what we were after and strung the girl up for her eternal dirt nap. alas. and then we exited. cya wudn't want 2b ya. john held onto the string faithfully. her life depended on it..he refused a ciggy. we crawled out to the bakyard manhole and i leveraged it up. cold ground. the bikes w8ed 4 us.

7:31 AM, September 08, 2006  

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