Tabloid Whore!



Gaw! I'm so glad I remembered my hat!

A while back there were rumors about Jessica Simpson possibly having an on-set affair with a guy named Dane Cook, her co-star in the upcoming movie "Employee of The Month." Since it looked like the tabloids just wanted to connect Jessica with another one of her co-stars (ala Johnny "pukey" Knoxville), I decided to give her a free pass on this one and pretty much dismiss the whole thing. This was also due to the fact that Dane's live-in girlfriend of two years, Raquel Houghton, publicly said the rumors were a bunch of B.S...and that nothing was going on between the two. Well, it's a few weeks later and The National Enquirer has come out with a story saying that Dane's girlfriend has discovered that an affair between Simpson and Cook allegedly did occur. A friend told the NE that "Raquel confronted Dane about the rumored affair with Jessica in late March. He told her that it was an innocent on-set romance. Raquel hit the roof-saying that there was no such thing as an innocent on-set romance and that she was going to move out." Although Cook is said to be trying to "make up" with his girlfriend, he and Simpson were reportedly spotted together at the Improv on April 5th where Jessica tried to hide from everyone by wearing a "big floppy hat and glasses." Yeah, that works.
So if this story is true, tsk! tsk! Jessica Simpson! Yes, Nick may be whoring around with a bunch of different girls right now, but at least none of them have boyfriends or husbands. Jessica always seems to be connected to men with wives or girlfriends. Her alleged affair list includes: 1) Johnny Knoxville (married) 2) Bam Margera (Jen Rivell, now EX girlfriend) and now, 3) Dane Cook (live-in g/f). And for Dane...what is it with these men who are in relationships but seem to suddenly forget about them just to get a little hot extracurricular tail from a dumb ass chick? I don't get it. Also, I never even heard of this fellow Dane Cook before this whole scandal and God forbid this is the result of some desperate publicist planting fake stories about Jessica whoring around just to get free publicity for their client. Either one could be true cuz Hollywood is filled with tons of fake stories, not to mention, dirty, dirty affairs!
Source: The National Enquirer


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm sick of this girl. Her ego knows no bounds. Did celebs learn nothing from J-Lo's crash and burn when she got so full of herself?

11:12 AM, April 18, 2006  
Blogger Pandaface said...

you've never heard of Dane Cook? tsk tsk.

1:44 PM, April 18, 2006  
Anonymous Cait said...

I've definately heard of Dane Cook before- he's a fairly huge comedian if you watch Comedy Central or listen to the radio a lot. I first heard of him probably two years ago, and fell in love watching him on Premium Blend.
Honestly, he is the best of her alleged affairs. Bam and Johnny are nasty, and I don't understand how she went from clean-cut Nick to scrabbly, dirty men (except Dane).
I do hope she gets her act together and, as every woman should, leave taken men alone.

2:04 PM, April 18, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dane Cook is frik'n awesome! I wonder if Jessica just had anal sex so she could still pretend she was a virgin like she did before she married Nick. She IS and ALWAYS has been a phoney slut (even when she went to high school in richardson texas) . She thinks that she is America's Sweetheart and can do anything and people will feel sorry for her. Well, I for one am totally sick of her and think besides her body she is fugly as hell. Oh and do not forget the abortion she had (the reason she and Nick broke up) and it WASN'T his baby, hello... Jessica the slutorama. blech!

2:11 PM, April 18, 2006  
Blogger Tabloid Whore! said...

oh dear people! i guess i must be missing out not being familiar with this cheater guy. he's pretty funny, eh? I dont watch comedy central so that's probably why I never heard of him. I'll try to check him out though since y'all are raving about him! :) I def will see the movie.

2:36 PM, April 18, 2006  
Anonymous ts said...

Oh TW.... I have been around town watching Dane Cook stand-ups quite a few times. He's so awesome. I haven't seen his movie but he is yummy! Def check him out.

7:39 PM, April 18, 2006  
Blogger Tabloid Whore! said...

sweet jesus people! it was ONE line in the post! ;)

7:52 PM, April 18, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ummm... Jessica... I'm married too. What are the chances that you and I, could... wait...

My wife said something about a snowball's chance...

I'll get back with ya on that one.


8:45 PM, April 18, 2006  
Blogger TL said...

I dunno who she's bonning, but her breasts in that picture are scaring me :( -TL

9:50 PM, April 18, 2006  
Blogger claireabelle7 said...

I'm no Jessica Simpson fan but the moron that wrote, "Oh and do not forget the abortion she had..." (by Anonymous - of course), must be a misogynist (look it up, idiot!). Is this a legitimate reason to, not only HATE a person, but to label them a "slutorama"? Millions of women undergo abortions every day. Are we all "slutoramas"?

6:26 PM, June 30, 2006  

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