Tabloid Whore!



Tonight the kids performed songs by Queen and believe it or not, it wasn't half as horrifying as I thought it would be. Unfortunately, as you can see, my good friend over at popbytes has lost all faith in this season's American Idol (but he does love Chris Daughtry!). I agree, with the exception of Chris, the season has been pretty weak, but hey, we still love to watch!

Bucky Covington "Fat Bottom Girls": In what seemed to be a tribute to last week's ousted contestant Mandisa (so sorry, I couldn't resist), Bucky sang a song which I think fit his style perfectly. He was rocking good hair and a black leather jacket and his voice sounded great. I don't agree with Simon that it was "just ok." This week, I was hot again for my white trash Bucky.

Ace Young "We Will Rock You": Ok, I would have much preferred to see Chris Daughtry cover this because I was a little worried Ace wouldn't be able to perform the powerhouse voice you need to sing this song. It was interesting to see Ace work the rock thang, I actually thought he was fairly decent. Unfortunately, judges hated it.

Kelly Pickler "Bohemian Rhapsody": Ha. Dumbass.

Chris Daughtry "Innuendo": oooooh, forget the song, look how hot Chris looks with his new facial hair. Grrrrr....Also rocked the black True Religion jeans with the thick white stiching. HOT. I loved his performance, but I agree with Simon, he could have had a bigger moment with a more recognizable song.

Katharine McPhee "Who Wants To Live Forever?": Ahhhhh...chills.

Elliot Yamin "Somebody To Love": Elliot's voice sounded really good, but it just didn't do much for me. I'm Sorry Elliot, I think I'm still coming down off of Chris. :(

Taylor Hicks "A Crazy Little Thing Called Love": I really wish Taylor would have stuck with "We Are The Champions." Yah, his voice sounded good as usual, but this just reminded me of a performance at Disneyland. Best part was when Simon said, "Taylor are you drunk?" Simon, marry me.

Paris Bennett "The Show Must Go On": Um, Paris? No.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

No longer an AI fan, but I do like Taylor. Sorry, Chris doesn't do it for me.

8:40 AM, April 12, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Lmmfao @ What U Said About Kellie. Ugh I Cant Stand Her. She Should Stick To Singing Country Even Though I Hate Country, But I Didnt Like Her Performance Last Night.

9:59 AM, April 12, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh puhleese, your review missed the mark on sooo many levels.

Bucky: Aptly named extra from the movie Deliverance, needs to find some hole in the wall Mississippi saloon to continue his karaoke career.

Ace: OMG, what a dick. Don't tell me you actually fell for that cheeseball? Wise up ladies, his kind are a dime a dozen and for god sake, do something with that greasy hair.

Kelly: She was awesome as usual. Obviously you have some issue with attractive women. A condition which prevents you from closing your eyes and listening to the voice of a champion. While you were crunching your half pound bag of Doritos, you missed another great performance. Try it sans the munchies sometime!

Chris: Yeah, jump on that media bandwagon and ride the fanfair right to the bank. He has one sound... one look... the man is one dimensional. No depth or ability to step outside that nasty, out-dated grunge persona. The type of artist where every song sounds the same. Ohhh, that will be a sweet CD to buy. "Didn't I just hear that track before? And the one before that?"

Katherine: She is breathtaking and talented beyond her years. She is destined for greatness. Watch her in the finals.

Elliot: Sounded fair at best. Just not enough heart.

Taylor: What an embarrassment. The new ride at Disneyland this summer will feature a larger version of Taylor with seating for eight. It consists of a massive hammer that will smash the thumbs of riders who will the writhe in pain, much like this imbicile.

Paris: Um, Paris? YES! What's the matter? Were you back in the kitchen grabbing more goodies to throw down your throat when Paris was on stage? This wonder girl is unbelievable. Talk about stepping out of the box - she is clearly not a Queen listener, but she nailed this song as well as her chances at the finals. She is talent personafide.

When you ladies can stop riding the edge of the coffee table while drooling over the likes of Ace, Chris, and god forbid Bucky, long enough to actually listen to these artists (I use that term loosely with many of them), then perhaps you might actually compose a well thought out review rather than riding the wave of your well-worn table. Since this season began, I have yet to keep my drink from shooting out my nose when that seizure-king Taylor walks on stage. He'd never make it performing at an EMT convention - everyone would be trying to hold him down rendering first aid. He's a joke.

With your comment moderation, I doubt you will post this (without editing it). I read your blog regularly and find humor in your posts, though on many of them, I don't think you were going for a comedic response.

1:37 PM, April 12, 2006  
Blogger Tabloid Whore! said...

anonymous 1:37:
1) I always post all comments unless, they are a) spam b)blantantly racist or homophobic c) have absolutely nothing at all to do with the post topic.

2) Your review was interesting. But just cuz you don't agree with me, don't take it as an opportunity to be an asshole.

3) As I have mentioned in past posts, there are plenty of "well thought reviews" out there on idol..if you are looking to read one of those, go to every week. Kim is amazing. I don't have the time or energy to do anything more than what you see here. Plus, it's my stinkin' blog, I'll do it how i want to do it.

3)thanks, but my choice of munchies last night was not doritos, but girlscout cookies. And trust me, I don't have issues with "pretty girls." Unless Katharine is ugly and i just am not seeing it.

4) Thank you for saying you read the blog regularly, but if you don't think most of the time I am going for the comedic response, then you obviously don't get the blog.

Anyway, nice to see that at least one person out there can get so worked up about Idol this season. God Bless You!

2:21 PM, April 12, 2006  
Anonymous tina said...

hey tw, who knew that kelli pickler's family read your blog!

4:03 PM, April 12, 2006  
Blogger Tabloid Whore! said...

oops! got the url wrong for girls talkin' smack. I always forget there is no "G" its:

for anyone who wants to check em out!

4:22 PM, April 12, 2006  
Anonymous Superfecta Bob said...

TW..BRAVO on your response to 1:37

6:18 PM, April 12, 2006  

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