Tabloid Whore!



Will Makar: Oh my little baby John Mayer! He is soooo adorable. Oh my God, I have a crush on a 15 year old, help me. Will sang Jackson 5's "I Want You Back," not the best song choice, not the best voice, but he's got a little spark on stage. He also kinda looks like Fred Savage, but I'm going to try and forget that. Oh wow, if I was a teenager, I would be all over that kid. Damn Paula for comparing him to Bobby Brady! He is my official adorable boy of the season who is not spectacular, but so damn cute that I will back him. Now all he needs to do is a Mayer song.

Kevin Covais: Aww Kevin. He has a lisp and is dorky, so I will automatically love him (don't worry folks, i'm not voting this season). Oh I am weeping. What a little doll. I will not say anything bad about sweet Kevin.

Patrick Hall: Ok, Patrick is aight, he sang Come To My Window. He seems so out of place on Idol though. That's ok, sometimes I like that. He is very tall and something just seemed weird though. He seems uncomfortable standing up. I will give him another chance. Oh sweet Lord, who was THAT woman listed under "Patrick's friends" with the big lips in the audience?

Taylor Hicks: ahh, we love Taylor! He looks like Jay Leno and is so fun and different. Sounds like Joe Cocker, I can't wait to see more of this guy. I like how he yells, "I Love American Idol!" Cool guy.

Chris Daughtry: Chris sang "Wanted: Dead or Alive." Ahhhh, I've found my rocker for the season. F'in love this shit!

Elliot Yamin: He has horrible facial hair, bad teeth and a an even worse haircut. Did nothing for me. Nothing. A friend of mine (bless his heart, he means no harm) said Elliot reminded him of an Amish terrorist. I am stunned that Simon said he had the best voice. Will have to give him a second chance I guess.

Jose "Sway!" Panala: Ok, seriously, who was squeezing Jose's balls throughout the whole song?

David Radford: Ok, David is cute, he sang "Crazy Little Thing Called Love," but when I hear crooner on AI now, I think John Stevens and my allegiance will always be to that little red head, God bless him. David is cute and goofy and was doing Elvis moves or something. I don't know...I don't see him lasting terribly long. He's John Stevens and John Peter Lewis mixed together. OK, and please smack all the girls with their "Poodle Pound." Puke!

Gedeon McKinney: Gideon, I have to be honest...I was involved in a very important email when he was on and missed his performance. oops. Seemed nice tho!

Bucky Covington: Oh crap. I hate being so mean. Bucky... I can barely understand him, plus he has bad teeth. He is just a good ol Southern boy who means no harm, so I feel really bad when I make fun and stuff. I will try to refrain from making fun of how he speaks, because yes, I get the guilt. Bucky is singing Simple Man from Lynard Skynard. Oh I usually love my rockers to death, but ouuuch, he is gravely, scratchy and I need a throat lozenge after listening to him. Oh Bo and Constantine, I miss you so. I'd like him to forward on since I'm just kinda curious on how he'll do next. Unpredictable.

Ace Young: Oh God, he is a HUNK! I love Ace. He sang Father Figure and everything about him is perfect. The voice, the face, the outfit. Those dreamy blue eyes! He even pushes his hair back like Constantine did! I'm tempted to dial, I'm tempted to dial!! And what about that brother we saw in the audience?? There are two of those gorgeous men? Thank you Jesus!

Hey! I'm Bobby Bennett Holla!: Oh dear Granny, why did you have to ask Bobby to do Copa Cabana? What can I say about Bobby? Not to sound like Simon, but I really did feel like I was on a cruise ship watching this fellow. He was like a big Santa. Most surreal moment of the show.

Dudes in order of like: Chris Daughtry, Ace Young, Taylor Hicks.

If you want to check out an Idol top 12 review that is more concise, thought out and doesn't say things like "I don't like so-and-so because he has bad teeth, please visit my pals over at Girls Talkin' Smack for their Idol rundown. Plus, they like Constantine over there, so you know they have pretty good taste.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Okay, I admit it, I watched, but only because nothing else was on. No more voting though. Ever. OMG, what the hell could be better than supergay Bobby Bennett? You know you were dancing in your chair! I hope he's the next American Idol! Gedeon, loved him. Liked David, no idea why no one else did. Loved Elliot, hated looking at him, can't wait for his makeover. Bucky sucks ass, but I'd do him. Twice. Missed the Leno look-alike. Ace is HOT, did a good job on George Michael, but I don't think he has a really great voice. Jose..I LOVE falsetto, but my mind wandered during his performance, so I doubt I liked it all that much. All in all, BOBBY BENNETT all the way!

10:26 AM, February 23, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

my dear sweet, darling TW, i cannot beleive you still buy into the Constantine act. Even the judges kept referring to his fakeness last night. I know you are smarter than that and you'll eventually realize he has no character and was acting to get his 15 minutes. I know you value real people. I'm stumped!

My fav's as well, Chris, Taylor and Ace (who is nothing like the faker).

i do love you TW!

your lunch & shopping pal

10:44 AM, February 23, 2006  
Blogger Tabloid Whore! said...

anonymous 10:44: I am convinced that Constantine must have turned you down for a date once for you to be so bitter towards him. Maybe back during some crazy NY days? I will always looove him and you can peer pressure this bitch all you want, I am loyal to the freakin' end. ;)

10:54 AM, February 23, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

How the heck can anyone actually still care about one of last year's castoffs? I forgot about my castoff the second the season was over. They are so 2005.

11:02 AM, February 23, 2006  
Blogger willam said...

seana, the blond chick who played former Rock of Ages castmember/Now American Idol Katherine McPhee's part in the show actually dated Taylor Hicks in Alabama.
love useless info? i do.

11:49 AM, February 23, 2006  
Anonymous jpfl said...

Nothing I hate more than bad teeth and there are too many dudes with horrible teeth this year.
Taylor Hicks is my man, he's different and can sing and love how he always yells out something at the end.
Ace- sexy as hell...loved the shot of him with the skull cap which really showed his eyes.
Sway is just a pimp and not a good one
And my bald rocker-mmmmmlove him.
My top 3- Taylor, Ace and Chris.

12:13 PM, February 23, 2006  
Anonymous jpfl said...

Anonymous Chick,
I couldn't agree with TW really sound like a bitter jealous woman.Constantine is not the faker here...perhaps you are....

Constantine has a pilot in the works with Kelsey Grammar and a record deal....what do you have?

Does belittling other people make you feel better about your own failures?

It really doesn't take too much creativity to come up with a handle, why dont' you work on that.

12:41 PM, February 23, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

jeez, someone always has to turn full on bitch. And, no, I'm not the anononymous poster you were addressing, jpfl. Let's all play nice, please, everyone. We're all such sexy bitches.

1:24 PM, February 23, 2006  
Blogger Tabloid Whore! said...

please. lets not be mean people. Lets not turn this comments section into a war section where people are vicious towards each other. It's more fun to stick to commenting on the topic posted rather than start hating on one another. Please?

1:34 PM, February 23, 2006  
Blogger Tabloid Whore! said...

Willam: That is all crazy 6 degrees of separation..I love it! and I love your "useless info" you are the best.

1:42 PM, February 23, 2006  
Anonymous Kim said...

Oh man, I could NOT understand a SINGLE thing Bucky said when Ryan was asking him. I heard something about Bo and later on I realized he mentioned Carrie too. So that gave me a gist of what he was trying to say. It was hilarious though. I think he's more country actually and just decided to go rock for the night.

As Im sure you know by now, I hate Acehole. So no more comments about him. But I definetly agree w/ you on Will. Lol, your review was hilarious, Im laughing out loud!

I also think its funny how people who attempt to diss Constantine are ALWAYS anonymous! Whats up with that? Oh well, if I had a gripe with someone that awesome I'd be too embarassed to reveal myself as well! And as long as he keeps up the act, I'll keep buying it!

2:14 PM, February 23, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

For the most part...they all sucked and only Ace has a chance of being called not gross or dorky! Where's the talent?

2:33 PM, February 23, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

wow jpfl, i said those things to my TW with love and a bit of teasing and your "attack" makes me think that it is you that has issues to attack people you don't know over more people you .. don't know.

as far as a handle, not necessary. I put clues in my posts so that my TW knows who i am.

i recall recenly you going off about Michelle Kwan and people loving themselves for who they are and accepting their looks. Yet you comment on the men. Maybe these men don't care about their teeth. Pick a side.

I can't wait to see how long Constantines pilot lasts. My bet, it never makes it to air and if it does, 3 episodes max. We'll see.

As far as my accomplishments in life, many. I'm very proud.


3:58 PM, February 23, 2006  
Anonymous jpfl said...

I will end this silly feud now, for 'my TW'. Although I have to say it seems a bit creepy that you are quoting me all the way back to Michelle Kwan.

Good luck with your proud accomplishments in your life.

All My Best,

6:57 PM, February 23, 2006  
Anonymous jpfl said...

I thought the lady with the big lips in the audience was Nicolette

6:59 PM, February 23, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

its just my memory...i have a good one. My best to you as well.

:::fued ended:::

That woman in the audience looks like Felicity Huffman in Trans America!

Very, very scary.


8:06 PM, February 23, 2006  

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