Tabloid Whore!



Just yesterday I was having a conversation about Britney and Kevin with one of my buddies as he flipped through the latest issue of US Weekly. He commented on how Federline was set for life and was never going to leave Britney. I agreed to that and told him, "but he really needs to get a job!" Well good 'ol Kevin must have been listening to me because it looks as though Britney's boy has finally found himself one. Kevin, I knew you had it in you! Hey, he is actually married to this baby mamma, it's the right thing to do, y'all! What will Kevin be doing for employment? He has been recruited as a dance instructor at the dance school of Darrin Henson, who has choreographed routines for Spears, 'N Sync and Jennifer Lopez. C'mon! Everyone remembers the infomercial for Darrin's Dance Grooves! I have a friend who actually bought it...eeech! Just wait and see, soon Kevin's Dance Grooves will be hitting the streets and coming to a infomercial near you. Seriously though, everyone gives Kevin such a hard time. I admit, I was guilty of it in the very beginning of the relationship. I'm very protective of my Britney. I made my share of white trash, baggy pants, Freeto loving Fresno jokes. But then, just around the time he appeared on the cover of Details Magazine, I started softening up to the Federhunk a little bit. Come on, you have to admit, he does clean up nicely and when we heard him speak for the first time were actually amazed that he can put a sentence together and doesn't think the word ask is pronounced "aks." But the thing that did it for me was not the little ditty we learned on "Chaotic," that Kevin gives Britney sex 3 times a day, it was Britney's use of the word "Motherchucker" over and over again when she crashed Kevin's Details interview. If that doesn't show dedication to a good man, I don't know what does. For those of you who don't remember, here is one of my favorite exchanges from the fab couple:
Details: People think Kevin is with you for your money.
Kevin: Oh, yeah.
Britney: Well, time will tell, motherchuckers…
Kevin: What you hear about in all those bullshit-ass magazines is bullshit.
Ahhh, true love, true love.


Anonymous The Shadow said...

Kevin is a P-I-M-P. His boys can swim and he can't miss. How many broads has he knocked up so far? It's like he's setting up franchises across the country. Black, white, it doesn't matter. And now he's knocked up a super-rich chick. The only work he needs to do is pimping. "Bitch betta have my money."

11:42 AM, August 26, 2005  
Anonymous ci said...

I still think he sucks.

8:58 AM, August 29, 2005  

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