Tabloid Whore!



He may be fat, he may have a bit of a hygeine problem, but tonight, Dante became my King. Average Joe is starting to take that turn, you know the one, where you watch it with your hands over your eyes. Yes, the "hot guys" are now in the game, but I prefer to call them a bag full of freakin' Meatheads!

Ohhhhh how I hate these guys, especially the disgusting oily meathead Chris Carson (hssssssssss!) the knucklehead who came into the house and took over the Average Joe's bedroom by throwing their personal items out of the room onto the balcony while the AJ's just stood by and watched. Heartbroken. That is, until AJ Dante accomplished one of the most awesome moments in reality show history. While fighting over control of the room, Dante and meathead Chris are standing nose to nose. I mean, these two guys are literally staring each other down for a good 15-20 seconds. Chris is acting all smug, thinking "I'm the tuff guy from New Yawk, I'll scare dis punk," but then, Dante in all his glory says, "HI!!!" and kisses his opponent smack on the lips! What a glorious way to humiliate and bring down the big guy. The best part is that they are on TV so Mr. Muscles couldn't do a damn thing like punch Dante's lights out. The rest of the show consisted of idiot Anna falling under the spell of the meatheads (surprise!) and playing the old fashioned game of tonsil hockey with the first one she went into a hot tub with (blech!). The saddest part of the show came at elimination time, when Anna looks into the group of men and before even saying who was leaving, Dante, with the saddest look on his face looks at her and says, "It's me." Sadly, it was Dante's turn to go. But everyone knows how these shows work, the fat, crazy, smelly guys with a heart of gold never make it till the end. But to me, Dante left that house King of The Mountain. He stood up to the type of person who beat him down his whole life. Chris Carson on the other hand, will one day leave the house and have to worry that anytime he walks into a bar back in New York he will forever be known as "the brother who got kissed on the lips by the fat, smelly guy." Tonight, that guy, is my hero.


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