Tabloid Whore!

10.11.2006

JESSICA SIMPSON'S "I BELONG TO ME" VIDEO. NO, IT IS NOT "WHATEVER HAPPEND TO BABY JANE?" OKAY?

I know this is supposed to be her "sensitive" single off the album, so is it wrong that I burst out laughing in the middle of this? You have to watch for yourself. It's all kinds of crazy. I just have one thing to say...what up with cutting your hair with the manicure scissors girlfriend? You need your boy Ken Paves to hook you up with some proper tools. That ain't right. Too bad the video is so crazy whacked because the message of the song is quite good.

Thanks to my buddy MK over at popbytes for showing me this nightmare.




And for those of you who now need a little something to help your eyes stop burning, watch this.

34 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

first! yep too funny jessica is so pathetic! i liked nick's video.

4:25 PM, October 11, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Whats up with the underwear she finds in her bed...

4:39 PM, October 11, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That was so awful. Did daddy tell her that as advice during her mariial troubles. Who benifitted most, well besides Nick. Daddy Simpson did he keeps control over her and that keeps him in the money.

5:06 PM, October 11, 2006  
Anonymous overpaid, shallow celebrity dresser said...

Joe Simp is beating poor Jess with a leather whip for "Employee of the Month". Unfortunately, she likes it.

5:46 PM, October 11, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

the heavy makeup looks like Ally Sheedy's character in the Breakfast Club.

It's a strange video.

5:58 PM, October 11, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

wow - very interesting to contrast the two videos. not my thing, but i like nicks song & video.

maybe if she wansn't obsessively touching her neck the entire video or spitting out "baybee" after every other word it would be - well , not as completely awful as it is now.

6:28 PM, October 11, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

4:39: I was wondering the same thing! Who's tighty whities are those in her bed? That video was just bizarre....what's with the crazy psycho cutting the hair and smearing on makeup a la Courtney Love style??? She used to be a beautiful girl, she did somethign weird to her face.

7:29 PM, October 11, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh Lordy with those lips she has now

8:36 PM, October 11, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

jessica simpson is a waste of skin. she's pretty but not pretty enought to go all "anna nicole" in her video. what a giant douch bag. u belong to you? good. keep yourself away

8:48 PM, October 11, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

yeah.....the "baby" thing every 3 seconds was ridiculous!

12:16 AM, October 12, 2006  
Blogger get in mah belly said...

lolololol @ everyone's comments.

can you say drama? what is up with the tongue flicking in that video? that really is a distraction.

did anyone else think she sounded like that craphole britney spears?

jessica's Christian image gone by the wayside really seriously disturbs me. why did it have to be all a lie, cuz it is now.

12:37 AM, October 12, 2006  
Anonymous amy said...

Big eye roll at how she starts acting so dramatic at the end of it like she's really belting out those lines, puhleese!! Her voice is not strong in my opinion.

Also, I think the song had 4 lines in it she just repeated the whole time. Very annoying! How long did it take to write that one?

5:21 AM, October 12, 2006  
Blogger Heather said...

She definitely makes some weird faces when she sings, I've always thought that, even when I liked her. Now, she just seems really weird. What is up with her lips?

8:15 AM, October 12, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! She soooooo disgust me! No talent,No looks! No sexy body-NOTHING!!!!!

9:35 AM, October 12, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What this video needs is more cuts.

What a joke. Emote, Jessica, emote!

9:56 AM, October 12, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Cruella DeVille. Ready for her close up....

11:27 AM, October 12, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I admit it, I love Jessica, but I don't understand why she keeps touching her neck and clavicle! I'm also finding some striking similarities between Courtney Love and Jessica, which is just kind of scary!

1:06 PM, October 12, 2006  
Blogger kally said...

I still think she is hot..besides her inflated upper lip. but hey it's gone down since then! HAHA dont like all her crazy faces that she makes while singing though. i have always loved her, but still think she tries to impersonate jewel after that one performance she did with her a while back

1:24 PM, October 12, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I couldn’t help but notice her oversized upper lip the WHOLE video- shit enough already that thing looks swollen!

5:10 PM, October 12, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think she needs some more collegen lip injections. And I think my 3 year old could write a better song. That sucked.

5:55 PM, October 12, 2006  
Anonymous mizzie said...

what's with the baby thing...lol!!!
ewwww!!!

8:39 PM, October 12, 2006  
Anonymous Layla said...

Just for shits & giggles, watch the putrid video (Jessica's latest) with the volume off. It is hilarity personified! She is an absolute moron - LOL LOL!

11:14 PM, October 12, 2006  
Blogger d mumsie said...

Is she mimicing an acting coach off screen..? I mean her timing, over emoting is not normal. Weird.. With volume off, yes it is vey funny.

7:12 AM, October 13, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

She looks like shes having a spaz attack or something. She is so fake. Someone who keeps on saying OVER AND OVER AGAIN how much they love themselves is strange.

7:29 AM, October 13, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Fake Fake Fake...What is wrong with her??? She looks werid.

7:30 AM, October 13, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I HATE Jessica Simpson and surprisingly, I don't hate this video on first glance. Go figure. When you feel like that - well, she portrayed it pretty good.

5:45 PM, October 13, 2006  
Blogger Kristen said...

Is it just me, or does she look a lot like Brit with all that whore makeup on?

5:12 AM, October 14, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

She is a freakin guy in drag! I never vthought jessica was or is sexy....please lets move on to true sexy-BEYONCE,HALLE,ANGELINA,VIVICA,SCARLETT,JANET BUT NO WAY jessica is SEXY!

2:55 PM, October 14, 2006  
Anonymous Jezzicunt said...

I want to slap that pouting lip off her face. That is the dumbest video every seen. I don't know what the video was trying to prove, I think we all know that Jessica is souless. Good question about how those underwear got in her bed. I belong to me... so I'm gonna cut off my hair and put on whorish make up. Makes sense.

7:03 AM, October 15, 2006  
Blogger proudsoldierwife said...

Wow, this videos seriously sucks. Am I the only one that noticed that when she sings she looks like she's having a seizure? Ha ha. Yeah she looks like Britney Spears with all that makeup on. Wow, bad bad video.

11:28 AM, October 15, 2006  
Blogger VeeOoo said...

She looks fresh and clean without all the makeup. For the first time I though she looked beautiful."Stop Hating Folk"

1:39 PM, October 16, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think Jessica is going through some serious emotional changes/adjustments after her divorce. I wish her all the best.

2:31 AM, October 18, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

HAHAHAHAHA thats funny! You guys are too much!!! She has alot more money than any one of us has, so does it really matter how moronic she looks when she sings? Or how Bad her "new lips" look?

10:50 AM, December 20, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

who cares about how much money she has? it doesn't buy happiness, love or contentment.

11:40 AM, December 20, 2006  

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