Tabloid Whore!

2.21.2006

PAPA JOE TELLS LACHEY, "YOU'LL NEVER GET HALF!"



Over the weekend it came out that my darling Nick Lachey reserved the right to seek spousal support from Jessica Simpson when he filed his response to divorce papers on Friday. Normally, I would poo poo the idea of a man asking for spousal support (like Tori Spelling's husband) but in Nick's situation it's more a case of what he deserves to get rather than a way for him to get revenge on his ex. It is reported that Jessica made over $30 million last year and I stand by how I've always felt, if it weren't for her and NICK and Newlyweds, girlfriend wouldn't have even made half of that amount. Forget everyone who is saying, "ahh, Nick deserves that money for putting up with that airhead." Nick deserves half of that money because Jessica became a superstar as a result of being a part of "Nick and Jessica." Period. End of story.

Not surprisingly, Papa Joe is not pleased at the thought of Nick getting any of Jessica's money. If anyone should get half, it should be Papa Joe right? Mike Walker of The National Enquirer is reporting that Joe had a nasty confrontation with Nick recently, when they ran into each other at Sushi Roku in Santa Monica, CA. Eyewitnesses are claiming that Nick was with a buddy having lunch and when he was about to leave, Papa Joe came up to him and told him he would "never get half of everything in the divorce settlement!!" Then Nick allegedly told Papa Joe to "mind his own business!" and Joe starting going crazy and shit saying, "Grrrr! You'll get half over my dead body!!"
Nick, probably embarrassed once again over creepy Papa Joe's behavior, just looked at him with those dreamy blue eyes, walked out and said, "we'll see." Aw Nick, always the class act. What he should have said was, "oh ya? I'll get half and I f*@k'd your daughter too!"
Sources: CNN, The National Enquirer

13 Comments:

Blogger alliecat said...

Well said, about the I F***** your daughter. HEHEHE!!!! I love it. I think he should get some money too!! When I read that over the weekend I laughed and laughed, cuz I could only imagine what dear old dad was going to say!!!! Nick is so hot, and will wind up being better off without her!!

2:26 PM, February 21, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Papa Joe...hmmmm, he has seious issues about his relationship with his daughter. Creeeeepy!

5:08 AM, February 22, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Exactly, TW. I also think Tori's hubby should get some money though. She had a huge wedding and then fell madly in love with another man the first year of marriage? She obviously didn't take her vows seriously, she's got gazillions of dollars, she absolutely knows she will have to pay if she gets divorced, so why not? Not half certainly, but something. Teach girlfriend a lesson.

6:01 AM, February 22, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

PAPA JOE AND JESSICA SHOULD BE SHOT
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

5:19 PM, February 22, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

NICK SHOULD TAKE EVERYTHING THAT BITCH HAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
BLEED HER DRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

5:22 PM, February 22, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Jessica was in love with the attention she got because she was dating Nick; and them breaking up in 2001 was supposed to be FINAL. However, 9/11 happened; and as Joe has stated, JESSICA lost out because she released A Little Bit right before that date. When 9/11 happened, NO ONE cared about Jessica because more important things were going on; and Joe couldn't stand for it, so he tested the public waters.
Jessica was told when talking to US Weekly about her and Nick to call him her boyfriend to see how the public responded. They of course LOVED the idea and the talk was "Omg are they back together?”
The focus shifted off 9/11 where some were concerned and back on poor Jessica. Then she writes on her old MB that she NEVER called him her boyfriend she said BEST FRIEND and US Weekly decided to change her words to boyfriend.
Since that didn't get the talk to stop, Joe then realized what he had, a way for Jessica to make a COMEBACK since Irresistible was a flop or at the very least get Jessica out of debt from Sony. So Joe went and pleaded a few things to Nick about how his career would benefit from the marriage too.
Nick believing Joe would help agreed along with some pressure from Universal records to agree to the 'engagement' and in case you all forgot, Jessica spent MONTHS hiding her left hand and the ring was never seen. People were starting to question whether the engagement was real and then in May at the Kentucky Derby she started flashing it around to any and everyone. That satisfied people.
Then came the date for the wedding, Late Oct, why, the original release date for In This Skin was DEC 2002, Joe was convinced the wedding would sell her album but when it got delayed before the wedding, Joe convinced Jessica NOT to sign a primp.
That was because he was under the impression if she and Nick divorced without one she'd be able to take Nick for all he was worth entering the marriage which was about the same amount of money she owed Sony.
But what Joe didn't count on was after the wedding NO ONE really gave a dang about Jessica. Most didn't even believe they got married so he released a picture in the wee hours of the 27th JUST to prove it took place. The whole thing was staged and a set up and illegal because it was entered into to DEFRAUD everyone. JUST to sell.
Then Newlyweds came up, Jessica was even further in debt to Sony and Joe wanted her to make money to pay them back. Once again he convinced Nick it'd help HIS career too and since he too had an album coming out, he agreed. But the first season didn't help. It HURT Jessica's career as she was the laughing stock of Hollywood and Nick got sympathy for being married to a spoiled immature brat.
Her sales for In This Skin SUCKED to say the least, she sold LESS than Irresistible and Sony WAS within minutes of dropping her, with her still being 3 million in debt to them. But he heard the buzz on this site, that the fans WANTED Newlyweds footage; so Joe gave them what they wanted.
The ONLY WAY to get footage back then was on the reissue of In This Skin along with extras, including scenes from the wedding, recording Angels, Recording TMBA, etc. She sold, not on her talent as a singer, but because her being a stupid idiot.
Joe continued to market her as an idiot; it’s why season 2 became so forced with her stupid act. It went from being real to being an-over-the-top act and less believable. Well, Joe grew greedy; he wouldn't make money off Nick because contrary to reports in the rags he was NEVER Nick's manager so why promote Nick?
Joe started being manipulating and controlling, in order to get Jessica a huge fortune; but he still had to lie about how much money she made in 2004, (all to make her seem more sought after than she ever truly was). That's why this “marriage” lasted as long as it did.
After the first 30 episodes of Newlyweds ended, it was on MTV's site that there were no more episodes, that it was done. They went to the VMAs and the marriage problems started, why because they needed it to be a believable end since they were to break up back in 2004. BUT Joe wanted more money, and he got MTV to pick up the final option; but they dragged out giving Nick and Jessica an answer. Nick and Jessica said they wanted it over, but that they could be talked into ONE FINAL season. And they were forced into it because of contractual obligations.
Since the contract stated as long as Newlyweds was filming or airing, they were NOT allowed to get divorced; so they were stuck until March 2005.
So I started saying they'd announce a divorce as early as April 2005. But then ABC wanted another variety show. Joe needed something to improve Jessica's image because she was being seen as a slut and a drunk. He suggested to ABC that they go to Iraq and entertain the troops as a variety show special. This would help her image and ABC assumed it'd help ratings; but because so many people saw the final season of Newlyweds and thought they were over, many refused to watch the variety show. It got the least amount of ratings; but because of the special, they were once again contracted to remain married till the show aired. In order for the separation not look staged, they agreed it'd be announced Memorial Day Weekend.
Joe wanted it seen that Jess dumped Nick ‘cause it'd be better for her image; but being the lazy person she is, she wanted things over and done with. She shopped the story around too early.
E-Online was the first to agree to print it, but they agreed to wait till first thing Monday morning, Memorial Day, because there'd be less press. An idiot there at E-Online printed the story right after it was written.
Jessica, knowing Joe would be pissed off that she spoke too soon and would lose money by ABC, panicked and started threatening to sue to get the story removed; and the divorce announcement was delayed. US Weekly, who broke the story Oct 5th in their Oct 17th issue, was supposed to write that it was NO ONE’S fault and that it was a mutual decision because they grew apart. But because Joe sold Jessica to OK they were pissed off so they wrote the story TRASHING Jessica.
Well, Joe couldn't have that to happen because Jessica had to come off as the good one while Nick was the one to come off as the cheating louse; so they could do the poor Jessica story and the fans would eat it up (so Joe thought). Once again, the separation was denied.
Nick and Jessica were sent off to Italy NOT for their anniversary, but to get out of the spotlight. Because US Weekly said it'd be announced BEFORE Nov 1, Joe had to make them look like lying fools so he made sure Nov 1 came and went and they were still married.
Jessica was not with Nick on his birthday because he didn't want her there. She flew into Cincinnati on the 10th and took them out to lunch; the press reported on it as they were told to by her people.
I’m not sure why the announcement came out on the 23rd; probably it was for the reason given (which was less press coverage). But who knows?
Jessica wants this “marriage” to be over and done with, in order for her to get on with her life. She stopped caring what her fans thought years ago; so she didn't care about filing for divorce 3 1/2 weeks later. Because Joe was greedy and didn't get Jessica to sign a primp she loses out BIG TIME.
Karma is finally paying them back because no matter WHAT Joe tries to do to improve Jessica's image, it’s not working. She's being blamed for the split, and she's still coming across as a bitch with fewer and fewer people feeling sorry for her.
Her lips weren't makeup; it was a cosmetic procedure to improve the pout. It’s all an act. She is not seriously upset, except maybe because the press is being cruel to her and she wants them to love and fawn over her once again.
There is no love between Nick and Jessica, and anyone who ever truly saw Nick happy before being married to Jessica knows that he was never happy with her. So it’s what I said, people were blinded by what they were told and by what Newlyweds tried to convey.
It was all masterminded by Joe to keep the fans spending money buying what Jessica sold, buying what Jessica wore, wanting to be Jessica. Jessica's a dang good liar; she's had countless years of practice and her nonverbal acting skills are superb because people bought she was in love with Nick (which was all lies because she only knows how to love herself and her father).
If she could verbal act as well as she nonverbally acts, this girl would have a LONG career as an actress in Hollywood.
Nick isn't totally blameless in this, so please don’t think that I’m saying he is; but there was a reason why Jessica always did the talking. That way, SHE did more lying to the fans than Nick. Occasionally he did talk because it helped to make it look more realistic; but since Nick cared more about the fans, he wanted to lie as little as possible. Jessica gladly did it, because it gave her the only thing she wanted, the spotlight."
"From the way she dressed with Irresistible straight on down through the Boots Video, I had my thoughts she was not just the town slut but the state slut as well. Now I know more of the story once Nick got dragged into this crap. I know nothing really about Jessica, but I always wondered why she moved the Feb. of her junior year.
School ends either May or June (not sure which in Texas) so why not wait a few months till she finished? There was SOME big reason they ran out of the state, something Dad did that the church threw them out? Something Jessica did? I don't know. But when they got to LA she never was enrolled to do her senior year.
She needed home schooling for rest of her junior year, but did she also need it for her senior year? My theory is that if she enrolled in public school, she'd have to take a placement exam and then the secret would be out that she's functionally illiterate and can't read or write very well. Because that was so close to her breaking out on the music scene, it’d become public knowledge and how would that fact look?
Of course, Fantasia Barrino is illiterate and is proud to admit it; but to those who are prejudiced, her skin color would be blamed and excused. What would be a white person's reasons be for never learning to read?
As for what else I know, I know just about it all. Jessica's first manager was Paris D'Jon, who is the same one that 98 Degrees had. Paris knew there was NO WAY Jessica could stand up on her own against Britney and Christina because her vocals were not strong enough and she was nothing special.
Now I’m not sure WHO came up with the idea; but either Joe or Paris figured that if Jessica was romantically linked to an established star, it'd help her career. Nick Carter was supposed to be the boyfriend, but his manager and Jive Records flat out REFUSED.
Paris couldn't get anyone to agree to this arrangement, so the only way she'd get this so called boyfriend was to use someone whom he managed (enter 98 Degrees). The lucky band member, who became the boyfriend, was the one whose voice blended best with Jessica’s on “Where You Are”. The one (who was chosen) was Nick Lachey.
I don't know if Joe had a conscience back then; but shortly after this idea came about, Paris was fired and Joe took over managing Jess himself. Universal Records was promised a kickback off of all Jessica's sales because of Nick's help. Nick was told if he didn't agree, 98 Degrees would never get signed to another label again (not as a group nor as individuals).
When the breakup happened in 2001, Nick wasn't supposed to say a word because the breakup news was supposed to come from Jessica's camp. However, Nick was fed up with everything back then and his side of the story leaked out.
Management had to scramble for a cover story, and it was decided to state that Jessica dumped Nick to go find herself, experience other loves, finish growing up, etc. As payback for Nick opening his mouth and spilling the beans, the rest of the Revelation Tour STOPPED getting promoted and 98 Degrees’ sales plummeted as a result.”
"It’s not my THEORY, it’s what I happen to know; as for the "PROOF", do you think Joe would allow a paper trail? He's calculating and manipulative. He makes bad judgment calls because of greed, but he's been VERY careful to keep this secret hidden.
Because he knows if Nick reveals it all, Nick will get sympathy because he was blackmailed into it. He was threatened with being blackballed as an artist, told he'd never work in the biz again because Universal was powerful enough to do that. If he stepped forward with all Joe did to get Jessica a career (a marriage in name only to answer the above question - not an open marriage), he'd be ruined. Jessica would lose, Ashlee will lose and most importantly Joe would because he has his own record label now.
But he knows if he pushes Nick too hard, such as causing problems with him getting his share of the money in the divorce, Nick really doesn't have much to lose in doing a tell all, but Joe stands to lose EVERYTHING.
No I never saw the ETHS because I refused to listen to anymore lies. The reason for that story was simple; it was made it appear as if Joe cared.
A dad typically IS upset when his firstborn marries. However as with anything the Simpsons do, it goes WAY overboard; and then it backfires.
So in an attempt to sound the loving; caring; father whose daughter was truly getting married for love, he played the role by being miserable. Whether Tina knew the whole story or is as much part of the lies, I don't know. But it makes it more credible coming from her than from Joe. People don't believe Joe as much.
And yes I have gotten my info from a certain source, a source I cannot reveal to protect his or her identity because he or she is extremely close to the situation (and no its NOT Nick or Jessica).
And in the beginning I didn't know whether to believe this person; but the longer it went on, the more sense the stories I was being told made.
Nick's moved on, he's not miserable like the press make him out to be, and he's glad it’s all over.
Now I haven't spoken to him, in fact I haven't spoken to him in years. And yes, I'm still a fan - even through everything.
There’s a lot about Tina I don't know. Joe has lied and concocted such stories about all of them that it’s really hard to flesh through the truth.
I don't believe Jessica's age for a second. She looks a LOT older than 25, and that was going by her hands and her neck back in 2002 before the massive dieting. She struck me as being in her 30's, and it wouldn't surprise me at all if Joe lied about her age because the blonde pop singers were teens.
If Joe didn't claim Jess was younger, she'd never have been given a second glimpse. I don't know, and I’m just tossing around ideas for my own sake.
Tina, I can't tell if she's so terrified of Joe that she obeys him like that or if she's truly a clueless lump. She seems to me to act like the prim and proper abused wife who's told to keep her dang mouth shut unless told to speak. Again not a clue if it’s true, it's just speculation on my part."

5:40 PM, February 22, 2006  
Blogger Tabloid Whore! said...

anonymous 5:19, 5:22: you are crazy and I think I love you.

anonymous 5:40: You are just crazy and your comment is too damn long.

5:49 PM, February 22, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous 5;40...I needed 6 red bulls to try to read your comments...but still couldnt' do it.

10:43 PM, February 22, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Best thing i've heard all day

6:16 PM, February 23, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Papa Simpson wasn't above pimping out Jessica so he could live off of her. Of course he first tried having her be one of those sucky sweet Christian singers, but she couldn't make a go of it.

Now about the "home schooling" could it be because she was preggers???? Interesting that she tried saying she was a virgin when she married Nick, yeah, right. Typical Christian, fucking liars!
I hope Nick takes her ass and Papa Simpson's ass to the cleaners!!!

1:25 PM, February 25, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow you need to get a life to the person with the incredibly long and stupid entry. You are either a girl that is jealous because you could never be 1/20 as good as Jessica or a guy who's pissed because he could never get a girl like her. Either way, grow up.

2:55 PM, February 27, 2006  
Blogger PupSquadFoster said...

You should really go read the Rolling Stones article where they interview Nick. He seems genuinly destroyed by the loss of his marriage. It's a pretty depressing read really, but it cuts through the BS.

1:24 PM, April 24, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow your a bitch

11:10 AM, August 07, 2006  

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